Enter Noise Sensitive People

Enter Noise Sensitive People: Is a wonderful post that a dear friend of mine wrote, touching me in a way that the urge to write this post was born. It is funny how the world works, there is a young attractive woman sitting down at her computer to write a story, and at that same time there is a man half way around the world who is experiencing the words as they pop up on the screen in a swift succession. Her thoughts transported on the world wide web for all to see, but how many will find the right spot so they can hear the words ring true, not in pain, rather in excitement. Even when they talk about the pain of noise.

Noise is painful when all you seek is the peaceful sound of nothingness. How would it be then if you tried to escape the pain of silence. When the time is just right and the only sounds you can hear come from within, noise takes on a whole other meaning. Not the faint sounds of breathing, or the beat of your heart, as it sends the vital fluid through your body, only to be constricted by the vessels in you neck and head, making for a silent pain that has few rivals.

You try and imagine anything that will take your mind off the pain. And when I say imagine anything, it can be as sublime as lying atop a boat on a deep crater lake where the water is cold enough to preserve life. The only light are from the stars on a moonless night, and the red and green lights for port and starboard. The only other light comes from a beacon back at the docks but it is to my back and I am in a most comfortable position to stare at the night sky.

 The use of an anchor is futile in a lake over a thousand fathoms deep. But this lake is in my minds eye so I am kind of like a god in this world. I can make the ship whatever size I want it, or I could just imagine that I was the ship, and I could feel the icy waters below, except it feels good, as if the hull or my skin were like that of a giant mammal that can traverse the seven seas at great speeds, going from warm waters to cold water where your skin gets rejuvenated from the bodies of water that cover two thirds of this planet and is what gives us life as we all know it. But that is all changing at a rapid pace and you can quote me on this.

"Planet Earth is not in danger from global warming, however; the human race is about to cause a real world wide natural disaster that so many fanatics keep hoping for. Well they can stop what ever it is their doing because more than likely it will feed the monster that lies beneath. Every day the trash from all the industrial nations finds its way to the pacific ocean. There is a mass of plastic trash twice the size of the state of Texas, and it's getting bigger by the minute. Then there are the fresh water lakes and streams, you might as well forget any major river in the world as a source for fresh water. So mark my words, the next major crisis will not be over oil, it will be over water, because without water and salt, you will die, and if it's like what people drink in third world nations, then you will have massive disease, and I can just about guarantee this country turning into a split nation, one group grasping onto democracy while the other choses anarchy."

Now if I had that kind of connection I talked about at the beginning of this post I would share the reality of what we're doing to our beautiful home. Also if you're one of those people that thinks God is going to save us from ourselves, I wouldn't count on a personal appearance.  The problem is centuries old and so far we think we've done a great job. Well if that were true, why is it that we have to live against nature instead of with nature.

However, it is not too late to change our ways and learn to live with each other as a human race and work as one to save the whole. It's time we took responsibility for our home. Believe me when I say it can be done, just as a person can find a quiet place to escape pain, one can become one with the architect of this beautiful world we live in. Now is the time for everyone to look at the problem, make lifestyle changes, then make any kind of effort to find solutions. Even if it's finding a closer recycling place, or be really inventive and figure out how to produce energy more efficiently without the dangers of radiation. The answers are there, you just have to turn off your inner voice and wait for the idea to hit you, it's like nothing you've ever experienced before, unless you already have, then you know what I'm saying is true.

Taking It All In Stride

I wish I could say that everything in my life was as well off as I had hoped it to be just a few months past. I also wish that I was writing about next years trip to San Diego and all the great times I had to look forward to. Unfortunately life has thrown an obstacle before me that I can't just push aside like a pebble under toe. It is more like an earthquake has shaken the foundation of my being and I'm surrounded by the fallen stones from an ancient metropolitan city. I have all the basic need of human existence to get me by and a few modern conveniences as well.

The problem isn't whether I can keep the elements off my fragile human existence, nor am I afraid of what goes bump in the night. What scares me the most is how life is going on around me and for some unknown reason I'm taking it all in stride. The person for whom I've known all my life is looking back at himself and wondering what happened to the man walking into the dismal, lifeless state of melancholy. Why hasn't the light begun to dim and the walls built up around me. Where are the single minded thoughts, the fight to make things right in the world.

Is it possible that I have come to the fork in the road where I know by now that all storms come and go. Or is this where I realize a storm is forever on the horizon. Or is the point in my life where I decide what is worth fighting for and what is better left alone. Is this when I look at today instead of tomorrow and leave the flights of fancy to the young at heart and concentrate on what it takes to get from point a to b to c without wondering off to points x,y and z?

What is CBT?

I recently watched a video on how to be a better fighter last night. Actually it was more like early this morning, I had one of those sleepless nights that I really didn't need but at least this time it was more productive and informative then the many times before. I can not say for sure that it is a sign that I am in a manic cycle or rapid cycling, which would be much worse, however; what it did remind me of was something I learned some time ago, something that I can honestly say saved my life. What I am talking about is cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).

Primarily used to treat people with depression and other chemical imbalanced disorders, CBT is in my opinion the most effective tool anyone can learn to use to make them a better person and a happier one, too. However I also believe that cognitive behavioral therapy in my opinion is incorrectly named. What I mean by that is if you look at how the word therapy is viewed by most people, then you would think that only a person with a title or credentials can teach or be learned by, however; that is not entirely true, in fact there is a book titled, "The Idiots Guide to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy" that anyone who can read and takes the time to practice the tools that the book outlines in a simplistic yet structured way, then I would hypothesize instead of using the word therapy, it would be more logical to name it, Cognitive Behavioral Awareness.

The basis for my reasoning is that once you learn how the tools and theory behind CBT works, then it becomes a way of life. In theory at the least and possibly in reality, once a person uses what they have learned, they become a different person all together. Or more so they're personality will change to the point that anyone who knows them will see behavioral changes that will have many tangible affects. You may lose people you thought were your friends, but in reality were enabling in some form or fashion, while in all likelihood for every bad person in you're live you will meet or even change twice the number you had before. Now I can not say this is what will happen, I lost my marriage and although I eventually did make new friends, I can not say that is quit the same as it was before moving to where I live now. Of course this is my own doing and I do have more friends now than when I first moved here, and now that I am in school I am making new friends. However with my illness and current physical problems, I can contest that I am not an easy person to get close to.

So what is this CBT? First off it is not your normal therapy where you go to a shrink and talk about your feelings. It is actually quite the opposite. For one, it is a way of life that you must learn, which means you must un-learn your old ways in order for it to work. The first thing you learn is that you have boundaries, kind of like invisible walls that are there to protect you. It's not that you don't know about them, it's really more about understanding how to set them and keep them in place 24/7. Now there are too many tools and techniques for me to put in a single blog, e. g. that's where the therapist or a book come into play. Yes I did say therapist, contrary to what I previously said some people need a trained therapist that can teach you and there are group therapist that are just affective. Even if you were to buy a book on the subject i.e. the Dummies Guide or some other book that is a how to, but not an academic book, that would only bore you and most likely confuse you. No the academic books are for the therapist who first learn the theory, then they have to intern with someone until they get to the point where they can fly solo. Just like every other field some are better than others, so make sure you get one that is able to teach you even if you don't like them. The point of learning CBT is to learn that you are responsible for how others treat you, as well as how you should treat others. Yes I know it sounds absurd that you have the ability to control how you are being treated but it is the truth and essential, because the other side of that coin is how you treat people.

Think of it this way. Say your a woman and a man gets within a meter which is a little over three feet, at what point were you aware of his presence? And for that matter it really doesn't matter if your woman and the other person is a man or a woman and visa versa, the point is how are you going to treat them within the first boundary of physical space. Because how you treat them will determine more that half of the way they will treat you. And every second thereafter will be the difference in a positive encounter or a negative one. This applies even more so to those you know. If your significant other walks into the room with a look that you know is going to lead into some kind of fight or negative energy, how do you react to diffuse the situation to a comfortable level? Well there are many tools you can use in this situation, some are common and some will be unique the person and your relationship. It could be as simple as "hello love, you look upset, lets sit down and talk about it over a cup of coffee", or something along those lines. What you did there was show empathy and a willingness to talk or even just listen. There are certain rules that work with some people and others for the rest. The idea is that you learn to become aware of your own self and how you react or what your triggers are, also known as cognitive awareness. The more you learn about yourself the more you learn about other people, which is also known as behavioral awareness. Put the two together and over time you will find life is a little easier than it was.

I hope this post was as helpful for anyone who reads if. I know it has helped me realize that I haven't been tuned into my CB skills as of late, which for me can be a dangerous thing. I would like to hear any thoughts on what you thought about what I wrote and would anyone be interested in me writing a blog on bipolar disorder and how it has affected my life and the lives of my family and friends.

PS I would like to thank Julia, Meghan, and Mary from TMI weekly and their guest Sarah Harrison from Tango.com for inspiring me to write this, and as a courtesy I am adding a link to the video, so please take the time and watch the video that inspired this post. Thank you.

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