Enter Noise Sensitive People

Enter Noise Sensitive People: Is a wonderful post that a dear friend of mine wrote, touching me in a way that the urge to write this post was born. It is funny how the world works, there is a young attractive woman sitting down at her computer to write a story, and at that same time there is a man half way around the world who is experiencing the words as they pop up on the screen in a swift succession. Her thoughts transported on the world wide web for all to see, but how many will find the right spot so they can hear the words ring true, not in pain, rather in excitement. Even when they talk about the pain of noise.

Noise is painful when all you seek is the peaceful sound of nothingness. How would it be then if you tried to escape the pain of silence. When the time is just right and the only sounds you can hear come from within, noise takes on a whole other meaning. Not the faint sounds of breathing, or the beat of your heart, as it sends the vital fluid through your body, only to be constricted by the vessels in you neck and head, making for a silent pain that has few rivals.

You try and imagine anything that will take your mind off the pain. And when I say imagine anything, it can be as sublime as lying atop a boat on a deep crater lake where the water is cold enough to preserve life. The only light are from the stars on a moonless night, and the red and green lights for port and starboard. The only other light comes from a beacon back at the docks but it is to my back and I am in a most comfortable position to stare at the night sky.

 The use of an anchor is futile in a lake over a thousand fathoms deep. But this lake is in my minds eye so I am kind of like a god in this world. I can make the ship whatever size I want it, or I could just imagine that I was the ship, and I could feel the icy waters below, except it feels good, as if the hull or my skin were like that of a giant mammal that can traverse the seven seas at great speeds, going from warm waters to cold water where your skin gets rejuvenated from the bodies of water that cover two thirds of this planet and is what gives us life as we all know it. But that is all changing at a rapid pace and you can quote me on this.

"Planet Earth is not in danger from global warming, however; the human race is about to cause a real world wide natural disaster that so many fanatics keep hoping for. Well they can stop what ever it is their doing because more than likely it will feed the monster that lies beneath. Every day the trash from all the industrial nations finds its way to the pacific ocean. There is a mass of plastic trash twice the size of the state of Texas, and it's getting bigger by the minute. Then there are the fresh water lakes and streams, you might as well forget any major river in the world as a source for fresh water. So mark my words, the next major crisis will not be over oil, it will be over water, because without water and salt, you will die, and if it's like what people drink in third world nations, then you will have massive disease, and I can just about guarantee this country turning into a split nation, one group grasping onto democracy while the other choses anarchy."

Now if I had that kind of connection I talked about at the beginning of this post I would share the reality of what we're doing to our beautiful home. Also if you're one of those people that thinks God is going to save us from ourselves, I wouldn't count on a personal appearance.  The problem is centuries old and so far we think we've done a great job. Well if that were true, why is it that we have to live against nature instead of with nature.

However, it is not too late to change our ways and learn to live with each other as a human race and work as one to save the whole. It's time we took responsibility for our home. Believe me when I say it can be done, just as a person can find a quiet place to escape pain, one can become one with the architect of this beautiful world we live in. Now is the time for everyone to look at the problem, make lifestyle changes, then make any kind of effort to find solutions. Even if it's finding a closer recycling place, or be really inventive and figure out how to produce energy more efficiently without the dangers of radiation. The answers are there, you just have to turn off your inner voice and wait for the idea to hit you, it's like nothing you've ever experienced before, unless you already have, then you know what I'm saying is true.

What makes something simple seem like the world is going to crash in around you?

I have been doing a lot of thinking since the new year. It wasn't until just after the first and my birthday, which is on the fifth of January, that I began to realize that having back surgery could have done more harm than good. Ironically it was on my birthday that I had my first appointment with my surgeon since the procedure. I like the way that sounds, people don't have surgeries anymore, and the last time I heard the word operation was on TV or someone talking about that game, either way, that term seems to have been used so much that it has gone the way of cheap polyester suits.

It makes you wonder why we even call surgeons, surgeons when all they seem to do any more is one procedure after the other. Just as many doctors have become over paid Rn's, or Rn's should be doctors. I think my new word for 2010 is going to be proceedoralist. I am not normally this skeptical of Dr.'s, but mine is either so confident or just doesn't care how tight his schedule is. Please don't get me wrong, my psychiatrist will stay late and make sure everyone of his patients is seen on the day of their appointment. However, if one of his patients needs him, he will make sure that they receive the proper amount of time you need, and his staff is very good about keeping you updated on what's going on. Of course there may be some days you don't need the extra time and he seems to have a real talent for keeping things in balance.

Whereas on the morning of my procedure, my Dr. forgot all about coming into the little room where the Dr. can meet with your family and brief them on how things went, and when and where they can go once you're out of the recovery room. Not only did he just go from working on me, to going on to his next procedure, by the time my family found out what room I would be staying in, I was still in recovery and my side of the room was a mess. I guess the nurses were never informed that I was being admitted. Apparently the patient and his wife that had had that room to themselves didn't know either, which made for an even more awkward situation.

By the time I got settled in and had been listening in on the conversation going on around me, I started to realize I was going to be in for a long night. The man who lay in the bed across from me was battling cancer, and his wife was a real inspiration to humanity. Here she was not taller than five feet, yet she had already had a heart attack, had stints put in her main arteries, broken bones in her hand and her ankle, and even quit smoking after 50 plus years. Now she was taking care of her dieing husband, at the same time she lived on three acres of land, most of which had to be cut with a riding mower. She told us how she started her gas engine blower by putting it in a vice and from underneath, she was able to pull the cord to start the blasted thing.

So when the little things start to take a hold of me, I will think of her and the others like her. The worst of all though, and this is one I have no one to look to for inspiration, and that is when I think of what will my life be like when I'm the one lying in the bed as an adult baby that can no longer do anything for myself. It is bad enough that I could be looking at having permanent damage to my left foot. Or that when it comes to me and finding any kind of meaningful relationship. Then when you try and concentrate on a simple task like making it to your physical therapy on time, and you can't even do that, which is actually quite important, you can't help but see the world crashing in upon you. Yet some how you never stop looking for that silver lining. If not, there would be no point in writing in this blog.

First Day After Back Treatmeant.

On Thursday Dec the 3rd I went to the hospital for an outpatient procedure where I was given several shots in my lower back in order to ease the chronic pain I have been having for close to a year now. I know there's some fancy medical terminology for the procedure I had, but it's easier for me to just explain what they did. Besides if you have never had this done then me telling you some medical mumbo jumbo would be as effective as someone trying to talk to me in any language besides English. Which in its self is a said thing to admit to, but that's a whole other discussion.

Anyway, the idea behind giving me these, what I believe are called targeted shots. That is the Dr. first looks at an MRI of my back and then decides where he's going to try and inject some kind of steroid, I believe they use cortisone, in what he claims to be key areas of my back in order to see if it will have any kind of affect on the pain in my back. Of course I didn't think about it at the time, but I soon realized that while I was ling on my back, the thought entered my mind, how exactly was he going to know where to put that needle. Well it turns out that there is this rather large x-ray machine hanging over my back and this was his means of guiding the needle into the various places that he shot the cortisone into my lower back.

Well the procedure was only about two to three minutes long, however; once the pain medication kicked in, which wasn't until about thirty minutes after the procedure, did I fall into my bed and slept for nearly the rest of the day. Even though the I was dead to the world, the pain from the shots slowly began to make their way to my conscious mind. Which at first it wasn't so bad, but by the middle of last night or early this morning my entire back was so sore I didn't think I would make it through the night.

Well as it is going on twenty minutes past 10:00 am CST USA, I am finding it quite difficult to write this, which is frustrating because I wanted to talk more about what led me to even seeing an orthopedic surgeon in the first place. Anyway I hope that as the days go on I will be able to finish my writing and post more information on how things turn out. I also want to continue with my writings about my headache and discuss more about my feelings and thoughts on mental issues. And maybe even talk about some more positive things, however, at this moment I am about to pass out from the pain, or at least try and find a more comfortable position to be in. If anyone cares to share their stories on this subject, or have any suggestions as to what might have worked for your back pain, please leave a comment and I'll try to get back with anyone that does or just has a question as soon as I can.