I never thought I would have these feelings.

I must do a little background about myself for this entry to make sense. Imagine you are in school, it doesn't matter what year or the subject matter, all that matters to you is when will this ever end. Ever since you were a child you gave whomever was responsible for you a never ending battle in getting you to school and another one when it came time to do your homework. It wasn't that you couldn't learn, in reality, most of your friends that spent many long hours studying and trying to get the highest possible grades they could get. Whereas you could spend half that time studying and get the highest grades if you wanted to, however; you only put in just enough time to get a passing grade, with the exception of certain topics which came so easy to you, that you could rest assured that your grades would always be in the 95%-100 % range.

Now several years have gone buy and I find myself back in school. At first I take a single class just to get back in the swing of things. Then it's summer and I decide to take a class in a subject that I know enough about, that even though it's a 4 week class I decide to take it anyway. And I am happy to say that both of my grades turn out to be A's, so come this Fall Semester I decide it's time to take on a full load. Now on paper it says I am taking a total of 14 credit hours, 12 - 15 is considered full time, however, the way in which my schedule works is a bit wonkers. Mondays and Wednesdays are my full term classes, first class starts 08:00 - 12:30, and my second class meets at 19:00 - 20:15. On Thursdays I only have one class which begins at 16:00 - 22:30. This is a mini term class, or half semester, which is about 8 weeks, then my second mini term will start on the 13th of October.

I hope this demonstrates that my feelings towards school have changed. So much so one would be correct in saying that I've had a complete turnabout. No longer do I dread the idea of going to school, even on those Wednesday mornings when the night before I might have only had a few hours sleep. The way I feel right now is something I never thought I would ever feel. The idea of me not getting better than passing grades terrifies me. I have never studied like this in my entire scholastic career.

The way I see things right now in my life are so alien to me, I can hardly believe it's me. I have always wanted to do something constructive with my life but there was never a clear path to an actual reality. I can't say for sure what kind of job awaits me on the other side of the door. What I do know is that whatever awaits me, it will be something that I want to do, instead of something I might be able to do.

So what I have come to realize is that it's much better to be in the position of having a choice in what you do, rather than having the choice define what you can do. I have also learned that just because you choose to do one thing it doesn't mean you can't do something else at the same time. More on that to come.

All eyes on San Diego

Earlier tonight I took my final for my mini semester course in computer electronics. It's actually a two part course, the first four weeks are learning the hardware side of computers, while the second term focuses on the programing side. Not the kind of programming you so often hear of, rather the machine language, actually learning machine language. Which is where you learn the language of zeros and ones. As much as I would have liked to have put in another four weeks of school, I would have to say going to San Diego, and Comic Con were all plans made far in advance.

I just can't believe how close it is to the big event. I'll actually arriving on Saturday the 18th just four days before the madness and mayhem begins. Quite honestly I wish I had some kind of exoskeleton suit right out of some Anime or Manga world. I believe one of the first type of suits, which I just heard the Japanese have somehow replicated its basic design, was based on the Manga series called Gundam Seed.

Even though I am filming a documentary which has no pre-written script or actors and all the other aspects of a fictional film. One has to keep in mind this is Comic Con and though I don't have a storyboard guiding my direction I do have the experiance of being part of this event twice before as a volonteer, not to mention I once lived and worked in San Diego. I also have thought about doing just this for so long now I have dreams about it. Then there will be the mighty fans who will dress in character, almost taking on the part of whom ever they might be emulating, to a point where a savy director and crew could cast a real motion picture with the fans as the real stars.

I suppose that is part of what I hope to take away from this documentary. An adlibed oasis of well dressed characters with a great pasion for what will be their most charesed memories, at least I hope so. I remember the first time I walked through those magical doors of what is the San Diego Comic Con my life changed forever. I just hope that I can come within a fraction of how I felt and bring it to those who were there and to those around the world that have access to a computer. I have no delusions of grandure, my greatest achievment would be if It were to be screned at a future Comic Con, otherwise I plan to share my story with the world.